Why are ‘You’ messages unhelpful to use in Supported Self Management?
Pain self-management news
Posted by WebAdmin, Sat, October 03, 2026
"You" messages can make people feel blamed or judged, like saying, "You always forget to take your medicine." This can make them defensive and less likely to listen. It's better to use "I" messages, like "I notice sometimes the medicine isn't taken regularly," which helps keep the conversation friendly and supportive.
More examples
1. "You never ask for help."
“I see that you might need support sometimes.”
2. "You always leave things to the last minute."
“I notice that time management can be tough.”
3. "You don’t follow the plan we discussed."
“I’ve noticed some changes in how we’re following the plan.”
4. "You aren't doing enough exercise."
“I think it might be good to find more ways to stay active.”
5. "You forget to check your blood sugar."
"I’ve seen that checking blood sugar can be easy to forget."
These help keep the conversation positive!
#InspireSelfMgt